By Jiti Ogunye
We have banned your twitter
They aren’t our well wishers
They want to see us scatter
Forever warring with one another.
We have banned your darling twitter
Safe they are in far away America
Causing disharmony in Africa
Setting us up for eternal plunder.
In our land we don’t need any twitter
In the past, views were shared better
The good old days were by far saner
Let us march to the era of town criers.
If you like you may call me a liar
To me it does not really matter
My skin is now tougher and thicker
To your abuse that is always vulgar.
Yes, we have banned your twitter
Dub me an incorrigible truth twister
Or an unscrupulous power-monger
I relish still the office and my power.
I say we have banned your twitter
We are experts in the use of power
In wielding the sword of power
Your scornful head may be severed.
In our executive council chambers
Where weekly we gather to ponder
Unlike twitter we don’t scatter
We gather together to happily gather.
With the ban on this partisan Twitter
We can now sleep in power better
Cyber insults will be fewer
We may even rule Nigeria forever.
We may not be a super power
We remain in our domain the master
We can banish any insolent intruder
Including this troubling twitter.
Our economy may be in tatters
We may be a mendicant borrower
Inflation rate may be rising higher
Amongst the trailers, we are still a leader.
Poverty may be bitting harder
Unemployment rate getting higher
Misery may govern like a ruthless monster
But we continue to project our power.
Our corporate whole may be in danger
War may be raging within our borders
Living in our country may be riskier
But we lack no power to tame this Twitter.
Insecurity in the land has festered
Kidnapping has become rifer
Banditry has become scarier
But we can still slap this twitter.
We don’t even want the social media
We still have our ancient newspapers
We have our trusted broadcast media
To serve our defined whims and desires.
Forward never backward ever
Stone Age beckons, let’s move faster
Should the future be too tough to conquer
Patriots, let us race to the past to shelter.
• Ogunye is lawyer and public affairs analyst